ABOUT SIX or one--it's a birthday!

Kate's No. 1 birthday--What's it all about?

Maybe, like me, you have noticed. A new wrinkle on your face? Or the tiny blue lines running vertically up your ankle line? Or the sagging middle that won't obey the command to stay tucked in? Eek! What happened? Guess I forget to look.

To take charge and camouflage the obvious I purchased the slimline Spanx undergarment (I remember them as girdles--new is still miserable), I increased my sleep and I pushed dessert away. I looked again. The issues were, well, still issues. My mirror and thoughts critiqued each one, hoping to find no more.

For me the big issue was a birthday. The numbers I counted used to belong to my grandmother or even mom, but me?
Then I thought, if we are fortunate to live we have birthdays. Yes, we have birthdays...

I counted the years and yep!, birth to now--s-i-x-t-y s-e-v-e-n! I still can't believe it and to add complexity to the math, I congratulated my daughter on her 30+ b-day.  My mind KNOWS she is still 20ish? (her day is easy to remember--we share the same birthday!)

From morning to noon my denial of this infamous b-day year twirled around. Then the wisdom of my 4 year old grandson made the day.  When my daughter asked Michael "how old do you think I am?" He smiled, "about six, mom?"  

I like his answer. Six--it works. Because what is age anyway? In short, it is one day at a time, making life experiences. In the rear mirror I was perpetually middle-aged. It worked for years. I was an adult; the family and career in tow, each year much the same.

I guess the clock ticked by when I wasn't looking; now the physical evidence is in place.The daughter is grown. I am a grandmother. I live with a retired husband. And a few people introduce me as Mrs., not Alice. 

My naiveté about this year's b-day number sunk deeper when I found an old birthday card note written by mom. In the 1980's she had recorded one of our random conversations: "How old is she?" mom asked. I replied,"Oh, I don't know. About a normal age,"  Mom's age- early 60's and my age, early 40's. Mom's comment in sidebar: "What's normal? me or thee?" I can only guess her opinion!

Yeah, the years have gone by. With some advantages I might add. The alarm doesn't go off as daily as it did. I have happy memories and God has blessed me with some "forgotten" memories. Time permits a book to be read, long girlfriend lunches and the skills of lifelong learning to play at will. I get the senior discounts without asking and matinee movies are easy. I get grand hugs and remember when stories, even an occasional hand-written letter from a dear history friend.

I like the way this age fits. Someone described this season perfectly: "In the late stages of autumn the best of aging is simply old enough to manage ones affairs and young enough to work wildly and passionately." The daily still works. I am blessed. The birthday year is six, sixty or one. It is perspective--the inside telling the outside.

But I can't help but ponder in my first week of a new birthday. If it all ended tonight --Did I give more than I received? Did I laugh and cause laughter? Did I give happy memories to the lives I touched? And did I walk with my Lord?  ...for indeed, that is the essence of the years.

Best...and Happy Birthday,

Alice

a favorite read: I Feel Bad about My Neck by Nora Ephron (her funny approach to aging)

a favorite scripture: Job 12:12 "Is not wisdom found among the aged? Does not long life bring understanding?"

a favorite blog: www.aprimitiveplace.org (if you like old)

History FRIENDS...ah, the memories

I opened my email to a notice of the passing of a friend I've known for 30+ years. I immediately called his wife and renewed our friendship from years ago, putting the miles between us aside. Her husband's illness, her loss, was part of our conversation but equally valuable was the renewed laughter, memories of the good times in early marriage.

One of our favorite memories starts with a simple dinner invitation after meeting at church.  We were in our early thirties, she a mother of two little boys and I, not yet a mother. My husband and I decided to invite several families from our Sunday School class for dinner. I immediately reckoned with their children, as I knew little about young boys and girls. "Never mind," I thought. I'll make guest arrangement easy. I'll put six adults at the dining table and the little ones at my small kitchen table. All fit perfectly.The mom's were so pleased I had thought of a childhood table and I was pleased to manage an adult table in the style I loved to create. 

Next, came the menu plan. Back in the Texas 70's the menu was fairly predictable. My choices of brisket, potato salad, copper penny carrots, tossed salad and apple pie fit the mold. Cooking was easy--the brisket was an overnight slow cooker, the potato salad mixed little reds with onion, celery, hard-cooked eggs and real mayonnaise. And in case you have forgotten the copper penny carrots, they were steamed carrots marinated in spices and tomato soup. And Helen Corbitt's famous dutch apple pie. Yum! What memories and what fun. I laugh. We never thought of calories or nutrition; it was all about flavor. How good does it taste?

But back to the dinner party. I wanted everything to be just right. For me that meant place mats and cloth napkins that complimented my new Frankoma pottery. The table hosted a centerpiece of fresh flowers (from my flower garden) just the right height to talk over and maybe, small votive candles. I was happy; now friends were immersed in a happy evening. It couldn't get better.

After the first serving I had placed the food on the cabinet in the kitchen. As I noticed the guests plates near empty I went to the kitchen to get one dish at a time, to pass and replenish their plates. "Not a problem," I remember thinking. Each dish could pass as I went to get the next.

Veggies, salad and the brisket. The brisket? What did I do with it? I looked in the oven, on the range, across the cabinet.
"Don't worry," I heard a little voice say. "Your little schnauzer Oliver, sure did like the meat." The meat? "Yea, we thought he'd like it, so we set the plate on the floor. He ate it all!"

I looked at the dog's face--messy from edge to edge. Eek! What do I do? I put Oliver out to play (or recover) and walked back to the dining table. "Everyone ready for dessert?"

I never mentioned the failure for brisket to be passed. No one asked and apple pie was served! 

p.s. Years later, at one of the boy's wedding showers, I told "his" story. His mom had never known! What fun and memories!

Enjoy a memory,

Alice

a favorite scripture: "Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life." Proverbs 4:23

a favorite book: BEST FOOD WRITING 2010 by Holly Hughes.
I downloaded this on my Nook. It is such fun reading--short articles from assorted food magazines. I love the shortness. Just right for a read while getting gas or driving through the car wash.

a favorite blog: http://acreativedreamer.blogspot.com --amazing creativity--enjoy!

WHAT DID YOU SAY?

WHAT did you say?

We laughed until our jaws hurt and tears flowed from our eyes. My daughter and I reminisced over comments strangers have said to us as we encountered them in strange places. Comments that seem acceptable, but in reverse...well, you decide.
Oh, the word stranger -- someone we have never met that strikes up a conversation, be it where ever.

1. "your hands are so-o full"
Setting - Daughter with three kids, ages four and under in Target. Her smile and great comeback,
"Sure are, you want to help?"

2. "why, you're a lefty?"
Setting - Signing the charge box at Walmarts. "What did he think, I purposely used the wrong hand?" Never do I remember commenting "why, you are a righty. (Lefties get it all the time).

3. "you can wear anything, you are so-o skinny."
Built like a pencil, my sister does look great. But has she ever looked around and said,
"My, my, you sure are fat." --think she might be taken into custody for slander and the worst of taste?

4. "I've never seen anyone do it "that way."
Hmm. Must be the wrong way. Cutting the cantaloupe stem down or horizontal? What do the experts say?

5. "your hair is so red or curly or ...." "you are so short...tall." What's one to say? Words fail me. "Yep,did it on purpose."

6. "Do you do stairs?" asked the young  25 year old clerk as I (twice-plus-her age) started up two flights in the local department store.
Proof in the "puddin." I just stepped with more enthusiasm!

7. "you're not going to believe the crowd I have up here," said the young highway patrolman as he stood at our car writing out the warning.
Setting - Five of us were en route to the mountains for a stitcher's get-away. Speeding, how did it happen? Regardless, we were clocked and the patrolman pulled us over. "Where you ladies going?"
"We're quilters," one said.
And from the back came the rug hooker's golden voice "and we're hookers too." He left our car, went back to check his computer and returned laughing. "WHAT did you say?"

Case resolved. Stay tuned for the next strange conversation.

Find a laugh in your day,

Best,

ALICE

a favorite scripture: "...he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed." Proverbs 11:25

a funny book: I REMEMBER NOTHING, Nora Ephron.Knopf Publishing. 2010

a great blog: http://workingwritersandbloggers.com/
  --great tips for writers and bloggers, multiple categories. book tours and interviews